This is going to be a quick check-in, as I’m in SoCal visiting Danny’s fam. He spent the week down here and I joined him for the long weekend. As always, it’s wonderful to see his fam, eat the good foods, and hang out with his five year-old niece. She is so funny and tells the best stories, and can entertain herself for hours building homes out of rocks for the bugs; she totally cracks me up.
She had her dance recital yesterday at the county fair, and afterwards, I asked if she had fun. She said, ‘Yeah! I was on the stage for the first time!’ ‘How did that feel?’ I asked. ‘Great! Everybody was looking at ME.’ (She’s the peanut all the way on the left in the pink and white polka dot suit. They danced to ‘Splish Splash, I Was Takin’ a Bath.’)
Today, we’re making carnitas, which is an all-day affair. Danny and I are also going to take Sofia to the park for a bit and maybe to get ice cream. We had planned to go to the beach, but it’s too cold there (and too hot here! I forgot how hot it gets in the desert).
In other news, I went to hot yoga for the first time in five years on Monday and again on Thursday, and I was *sore* after Monday. That is a legit workout. My main motivation is my fear of ‘text neck’ and all the screens that I look at on a daily basis. Yoga is the only way I know to fight that.
^Simple nachos that I made for myself with beans, pepper jack, cilantro, tomatos, and avocado.
I loved the clouds this day. I walked about five miles a day this past week as well.
Work remains bustling, but I’m feeling more and more settled with each passing week. I am still sometimes missing being a worker with less responsibility and more confidence, but I’m learning more and more about how to navigate the supervisor role.
Hope everyone is having a lovely Sunday! Love yous! 💝
Danny went to SoCal to spend the week with his fam – I’ll be joining him on Friday – so I have the apartment to myself all weekend. And…it’s kind of wonderful! I always enjoy the first few days of stretching out in the bed, finding things as I left them, and not having to factor in anyone else for decisions like what’s for dinner and what to listen to. (After a few days, I do start to miss him. I really like my buddy. ❤️)
Love this philosophy.
I’ve made some really good meals lately, if I do say so myself. I’ve been having more work lunches lately, so I’m especially enjoying cooking dinner. Here’s some recipes that we’re enjoying:
Stuffed Poblano Peppers. We probably have this one once a month. I normally serve with sliced avocado and tortillas.
Killer Spinach Salad. (This one has meat; sorry, Parents!) D has learned to appreciate salads more since we started dating and I tend to make us some version of a big dinner salad with bread once a week. The key to making a salad filling enough to be dinner is to add FAT and PROTEIN. Cheese, avocado, hard-boiled egg, beans, meat, tofu, olive oil: these are the things that make us feel satiated. Vegetables are so important, but you need the fats too! And a little goes a long way.
Twice-Baked Potatoes. I don’t really follow this recipe, as I A) don’t want to get heart disease when I’m 40, and B) it’s unnecessary. I like to add diced red pepper, use sautéed white onion when I don’t have green, sub mushrooms for bacon, sub part yogurt for part sour cream, etc. You can really make it your own! And it’s such an easy quick dinner with a side salad.
I also make some version of pasta pretty much every week. Often, I’ll sauté a bunch of veggies (onions, peppers, spinach, garlic), then add tomato sauce and spices and sometimes a little cream, mix in the pasta, and serve with Parmesan and black pepper. Other times, I’ll be a bit more creative. My parents and us all really like this brown butter mushroom pasta; cooking it in broth added a lot of flavor. I subbed spinach for the chard because it’s the greens I had on hand.
The above has been my breakfast for the past two days: onions and peppers sautéed in butter and scrambled with eggs and pepper jack cheese, a tortilla, sliced tomatoes with salt and pepper, and sliced avocado. I really want to start making fresh tortillas; Danny’s parents do and it really takes them to the next level. We just need to get the flattener contraption (and a bigger kitchen).
Oh, and THIS:
I impulsively bought this at Trader Joe’s (the only place where I impulsively buy anything) and am so happy I did. I drink tea most mornings because we don’t have a coffee maker (and because I like tea), but sometimes also end up buying coffee. This is perfect for those mornings that I’d rather have coffee and is far more cost-effective. And tastes better, actually. I love TJ’s.
I really like food, in case that’s not clear. So do my parents. The whole paternal side of my family actually.
Yesterday, I was invited to join coworkers on a Brew Cruz to celebrate the grad school graduation of one of the women that I supervise. I was kind of skeptical and awkward at first. For one, there were workers, supervisors, and my manager, and throwing alcohol in the mix makes me wary and uncomfortable. Plus, I rarely drink any alcohol at all now and my body just barely tolerates it. But it ended up being a great time and I bonded with some of my coworkers in a way that only alcohol allows. And, I knew my limits, both in intake and socially, and respected them, so I feel great today. (Oh, and the above photo was to show Danny that I straightened my hair for the time in 2.5 years, and remembered exactly why I stopped: it’s time-consuming and fruitless. And makes me *obsessive* about trying to get everything straight when, again, that is fruitless. Was nice to see just how long my hair is though.)
I’m still walking everyday. Our location is pretty much ideal, as we are 20-25 minutes from downtown and Trader Joe’s and 5 minutes from the beach. I walked to downtown earlier today and just felt as grateful as I always do for how pretty Santa Cruz is.
While downtown, I picked up creamer (see: coffee concentrate above), a new marker for my dry erase board (where I keep track of weekly appts and to dos), and a new journal.
Not only do I like the pattern and colors, it is embroidered! By hand! You can almost tell in this pic:
I also wandered around the bookstore for a bit, and resisted buying any more books. My ‘To Read’ stack is pretty high already and my time isn’t getting any freer!
Speaking of reading, here are some things I enjoyed from the interwebs this week:
The Dangerous Acceptance of Donald Trump. As much as I’d like to, the political season is unavoidable. And terrifying. Honestly, the only thing that scares me more than a Trump presidency is how many people are supporting him. Whether he wins or not, a large percentage of our county supports his values and ideals, and THAT is seriously unsettling.
Digital Sabbath. This is a short, informal essay in the form of a Facebook post from the beloved Elizabeth Gilbert about taking one day a week OFF from our phones. I love this idea, and also have no idea how to implement it (which is a little ridiculous, I know). Speaking of Elizabeth Gilbert, this is a great interview with her. She is so wise.
Cheri Huber – Ram Dass. “It is not my experience that we are here to fix the world, that we are here to change anything at all. I think we are here so the world can change us. And if part of that change is that the suffering of the world moves us to compassion, to awareness, to sympathy, to love, that is a very good thing.” More wisdoms about the spiritual journey that is Life. ❤️
Pe-TISH-ion. As always, Glennon is always so honest, so real, and so, so good at teaching love. This is about little girls growing up in a culture obsessed with women’s appearances and it made me feel all sorts of things. An excerpt:
“When I was little — I looked at the one size fits none standard of beauty and thought: ‘Damn. There’s something wrong with me.’ And Tish will look at the same crap and say: ‘Damn. There’s something wrong with THAT.’ […] And she’ll likely get a little pissed. And that’s what I want. I want girls who are angry instead of sick. Tweet: And she’ll likely get a little pissed. That’s what I want. I want girls who are angry instead of sick.” Here’s to girls who are angry! ❤️
This is actually a tiny swath of what I read on the internet each week. Maybe that’s why I don’t have time to read real books…
I had another looooooong work week. I worked something like 57.5 hours, which is a LOT for my small county. I became a supervisor at the exact time that we got *really* busy, and things just take me longer because I am new. One of the biggest challenges of being a supervisor is learning to own the responsibility of making decisions. I am still at the point where I second guess nearly all of my bigger decisions: whether we go out immediately – even though our staff are already feeling stretched thiiiiiin – or can wait ten days (or not go at all); whether we close a referral even though things aren’t *ideal*; whether to Substantiate an allegation. A good portion of our work exists in a gray area, and there is no flowchart of ‘if This, then do That.’ And these decisions have very real impacts on the families with which we work. My fellow supervisors have been wonderfully supportive -we have a really awesome team – and my manager has told me that she’d be far more concerned if I was already totally confident. But I’m still looking forward to feeling like I know what I’m doing. 😜
On the flip side, I have met some coworkers that I think will be real, maybe lifelong, friends. Being in California, and especially in Santa Cruz, I find far more like-minded people than I did in, say, Texas. While I don’t need everyone to think like me all the time (and while I actually really loved Austin), when you have a toe (or several) in the counterculture, in any form of non-mainstream culture, it can be harder to find a community. And it’s not even that more people think like me, it’s that they have similar values of openmindedness, and shared humanity, and compassion, and curiosity, and a commitment to spiritual growth. I’m so grateful for the time that I get to live here.
I finished my puzzle! We had gotten two similar owl puzzles, 500 pieces each, and I finished the second this weekend. I really like both of these. I *think* we’re going to keep these for ourselves. But I’m sort of considering giving them to his nieces. We will see. After we get these glued and framed, I’m going to start on a 1000-piece Bread Village puzzle that my parents got me for my birthday. I’m slightly intimidated by 1000-piecers; Aviva’s was a true labor of love. 😍
Flashback to Aviva’s!
Oh, and THIS happened!!!
I found a Rita’s!! In the town just five minutes north of us. This is the first time that I’ve seen water ice outside of the east coast, the first time that I’ve had water ice in probably a decade, and Danny’s first experience ever. (He loved the way it melts in your mouth. Obvi.) We got lemon and vanilla gelatis, and will certainly be back.
Some things that I read this week and really enjoyed:
High Maintenance. Love Mary Karr and love this topic. My mom’s BFF and I used to talk about this often. I’m still – in very un-minimalist-like behavior – holding on to a few pairs of heeled shoes ‘just in case.’ Like, I don’t even think I *could* wear them now. But they keep taking up space in my life. Ridiculous.
I’m off to walk and phone date with Evan, then making carne asada nachos for dinner and watching Grace and Frankie. I love Sundays. ☺️
First things first: Happy Mother’s Day to all the beautiful mothers in the world! I’m lucky to have several wonderful mothers who are very close to my heart. There’s my own mama, who is one of my favorite people in the world and has shown me that mothering continues well after your babies are grown up. There’s my Grandma, who is the matriarch of our large family and one of the most loving people that I’ve ever known. There’s my “step” Grandma, who has never once made us feel like “step” grandchildren. There’s my sister-in-law, who is a naturally wonderful and patient mother to my beautiful niece (and soon-to-be new niece or nephew). And there’s my bestie, Rooms, who is celebrating her first Mother’s Day as mother to one of the more precious babies that I’ve ever seen. Mothers are heroes and I am so grateful to know so many life-changers.
In honor of Mother’s Day, some of my favorite authors – some of whom are also mothers – have given us all an opportunity to be mothers. Glennon Melton, Cheryl Strayed, Brene Brown, Elizabeth Gilbert, and Rob Bell have all joined together to create The Compassion Collective, and they are raising monies for the refugee children in crisis abroad and the homeless youth in crisis here in America. This group, they break my heart open in the best ways possible, and I am so grateful and in awe of the work that they have done. To read an incredibly beautiful tribute to the mothers, as well as more about their efforts, click here and please, please, PLEASE donate, whatever you can. Small acts with great love will change the world.
In other news, I have remained very, very busy at work. Like, I even went into the office for a few hours yesterday (and was *amazed* at how much I can get done in three hours when I don’t have workers coming in to ask me questions every seven minutes). It’s not my ideal working conditions, but I’m also still so grateful that I get paid to do something that I really enjoy, with bright, compassionate, hardworking people, in a place that I love so much. If I have to work (and, like most people, I have to!), I couldn’t ask for a better place to be doing it.
And while it’s a lot of work, I learned my lessons about the importance of self-care and work/life boundaries from Austin. When I’m not at work, my phone is off, my computer is shut down, and I am doing things that I love. Like, morning walks and hikes with Danny, cooking, puzzling, farmer’s markets, beach time, and reading.
This Spring, I have been working my way through an online class with one of my heroines (mentioned above), Brene Brown. I’ve fallen pretty far behind, but Brene says that it is totally fine, so I’m going at my own pace. I’m still reading one of her books for that class, and am also finally reading Be Here Now by Ram Dass (the original JewBu!). One of the first things that interested me about Danny was his spiritual side – which has a definite Buddhist slant – and he has introduced me to Alan Watts, Ram Dass, Eckhart Tolle, and Krishnamurti, and their work has had a profound impact on my life and my worldview. And, as it turns out, I really, really enjoy reading, pondering, and talking about the existential side, values systems, egos, and the importance of perspective.
It’s been rainy this weekend, but we’ve managed to squeeze in some hikes around the rain and it’s been the perfect weather to indulge in Grace and Frankie, as season 2 was released this weekend, and Danny and I both love it! Danny wasn’t super familiar with Lily Tomlin until we saw Grandma last summer – which is excellent! – and then we discovered her new Netflix show. My parents weren’t fans – the characters are a bit too stereotypical for their tastes, which I understand – but D and I really like it.
And with that, I’m off to the farmer’s market to buy a crate of strawberries, some sausages, and to check for tomatoes. Tomato season in Santa Cruz County is my favorite. Hope you all are having a lovely weekend!
I think it’s kind of appropriate that my last post was after my first week of work. I’m not 100% sure that I’m going to do this regularly again, but my goal is going to be once a week. Even if it’s a short update.
These flowers are all over our neighborhood. I think they are so interesting looking!Close up!
So… I’m a Supervisor at work now, as most of you probably know. I was promoted two months ago, at the exact same time that we got really, really busy. Trial by fire? Sort of. There have been a few bumps over the last two months and I’ve definitely thought more than once about demoting myself back to when my workload was manageable and I knew what the heck I was doing. But overall, I’m enjoying the new challenge and know that the workload won’t be this high forever. And I think I’m doing a decent job! We’ll see.
The pink version of the same flower.
Danny and I are in a lovely habit now of waking up around 5:30/6ish (we barely need alarms), getting ready for the day, and heading over to Steamer Lane to walk before work. We watch the sunrise, the surfers, dolphins, and sea otters, while we drink tea and walk along the coast for 25-40 minutes. Our mornings are one of my favorite parts of the day and among my favorite reasons for continuing to live in Santa Cruz.
One of my least favorite reasons for continuing to live in Santa Cruz? The exorbitant cost of living. It is so, so high. My coworkers and I had a long discussion the other day on our way to training about buying homes in Santa Cruz. One of them has actually priced this out and laid out the numbers for us. Essentially, in order to maintain his small family of three’s quality of life and live in the neighborhood they want to live in, they’d need to buy a $700k 2-bedroom home. With 20% (or $140k) down, their mortgage would still be between $4500-$5000/month. They both have decently-paying professional jobs (he works with me and she is a nurse), and that’s still an extreme stretch for them. I mean, that’s basically our entire salary for the year. If even, after taxes. Later that night, one of them texted this “cheap” option. That, my people, is a $525k 2-bedroom fixer-upper in a less-than-desirable neighborhood. Ludicrous. And then you factor in the looming water crisis and the fact that scientists believe the northwest is due for a really, really big earthquake, and I end up at, “Yeah, I’ll keep renting.” (Which also doesn’t feel great, given what our rent is. But it’s still far less than a $5000/month mortgage.)
But we don’t dwell on these things. There is so much beauty to be enjoyed. And frankly, I have zero desire to leave Santa Cruz at this point in time. The rent is worth it. (For now.)
My latest puzzle. It’s only a 500-piecer.
[Realistically, when D and I do talk about buying, we are looking for land. Land to put a yurt or a tiny home or an airstream on would be ideal for us. We’re not looking for a big house and we want to be closer to the outdoors. And what we really want to do is build a whole bunch of tiny homes and house the homeless. But that’s a big dream. And again, there’s the whole earthquake / water crisis thing. And then we’re back to renting. Round and round it goes.]
Doesn’t this little guy look like beaded jewelry?
I’m planning a trip to NJ in early July. I want to meet my new niece or nephew when they are still super duper tiny, see my current beautiful niece, and visit Rooms’ rapidly growing baby girl. And see my parents, brother and sister-in-law, grandparents, and Lisa and Allie and their boys. I can totally fit that all in in five days, right? I’m pretty sure that I can. I can’t wait to see all the babies! Ah, the hardest part of being far away is missing the babies. Why can’t everyone I love come live in the city that I love? Wouldn’t that be great? I have always felt this way. I remember regularly posting this quote on AIM in college:
I feel big emotions. What can I say?
D’s niece and I, dunebuggying through the desert.A different kind of beauty.
We visited Danny’s family in Southern California last weekend. Ostensibly for his cousin’s baby’s birthday party, but really, we’re going down once a month to see his mom and the birthday party just happened to be that weekend. I really love his family, especially his nieces, and we had a great time. We took his niece to Scandia Family Fun Center and rode go karts, played games, went to the batting cages, and road rides. (Well, they did. I couldn’t handle it. Even D freaked out a little when he saw it, and he loves rides.)
Go Karts!
We’ve been taking advantage of the warm weather again and laying out at the beach for a few hours on the weekends, reading and dipping in the water (which is currently freezing). A nice thing about living three blocks from the beach is that you can go to the beach for only a few hours and then go on with your day, which is ideal for me. We’re getting closer and closer to buying wetsuits. It’s a small commitment and a little intimidating, but we both really, really want to try some of the water sports that Santa Cruz has to offer and a wetsuit is a prerequisite. We both want to kayak, and take paddleboard and surfing lessons.
Hiking remains a constant in our lives as well. We go after work 2-3 days a week and at least one day of the weekend, sometimes two. Oh, and farmer’s markets! We’ve been enjoying the most amazing strawberries, blueberries, raspberries, and blackberries, and it’s just about to be tomato season! We also make a 20-minute drive to Los Gatos on many Sundays, solely to get these jalapeno and cheese sausages that we love. The access to fresh produce and local farms is obviously another a huge plus. (Again, the rent is worth it.)
Strawberry Water! (Or, Our Kitchen Overflows with Strawberries!)
That’s all the random updates that I have for now. I’m headed out for a sunset walk. Love yous! ❤
She Won't Stop Talking 